People that were and used to blog about their careers, make up, other stuff and then they have a baby and its SUDDENLY all about the baby. I follow this one specific person who I adore as a make up artist and fashion loving chick...Very recently shes had a baby (5 weeks ago) and EVERY SINGLE DAY shes blogging about her, and updates every week(i.e., im 3/4/5/ weeks old today!!) I mean really, I adore my children. And I celebrate when they have milestones. But truly, its irritating and sickening that shes like this...
This isn't her first baby either. Its her 4th. HER FOURTH. I understand that every child is a blessing, but, honestly, before when she would write blogs, I would hurry to read them because they'd be about fashion and make up and the industry...now, its very rarely about that...NOW, its ALL about her new baby and her other kids...And i could see it happening when she was pregnant...Don't get me wrong, I still adore her, but honestly, its sickening how she is updating EVERY day/week...yes, there are people that want to know, yes babies are a blessing, but honestly I feel that people that take pics every five seconds of their kids and exclaim over EVERY little thing (i.e. OOOh, look, they're making spit bubbles, isn't that cute? Awww, now look, shes/hes turning his/her head...awww how cute how cute how cute how cute........) BLECHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH....
DO we REALLY need to know EVERY single detail about this? The only place I have pictures of my girls is on my facebook which is SO private that you cant even find me unless I give you the direct link and I know you PERSONALLY. I honestly cant understand people that splash their kids all over the internet!!! Don't they know what could happen? Don't they know that there are perverts out there? ESPECIALLY someone like her, who is and was in the spotlight on a daily basis. Shes a very known and popular guru and make up artist in L.A. California. She doesn't need to be splashing her baby's picture all over the place...
Shes mentioned that the father of her other kids has made it explicitly clear that HIS kids (not the same father as the baby) are NOT to be shown on the internet....for the exact reason that I mentioned....Her older boy is 14 and she shows him more often then not here lately, but she just blogged about the fact that she had to edit out a video because his EAR was in it and he didnt want to be shown...Smart kid.
I cant stand people that feel the need to ooh and ahh and coo and update people every 5 seconds of what their kids are doing, or what THEY are doing...
An ex friend of mine would update her facebook and myspace status EVERY 5 MINUTES. Im not kidding. Like people actually CARED what she was doing EVERY 5 minutes. And it was always puke inducing wretching updates..."Relaxing with my baby then who knows..." Five minutes later "cooking for my hunny, then we (insert whatever here)"........OR "kids are (insert whatever they're doing in THIS five minutes here)"...then 5 minutes later the cycle starts all over again...............its puke inducing. AND highly irritating. NOBODY NEEDS TO KNOW WHAT THE HELL YOU'RE DOING EVERY FIVE FRIGGIN MINUTES.
And when we were friends, I told her this, on many occasions, people often agreeing with me on her posts that it was ridiculous that shed be updating every 5 minutes....and shed keep doing it....Of course, this is also the same girl that lived with us for 7 months with her wretched bratty horribly behaved uncontrollable spawns of Satan (and I don't believe in Satan so thats saying something)...then she moved out in the end of February last year and promptly started sleeping with her husband's (yes, i said HUSBAND because they weren't divorced yet...she hadnt even STARTED divorce preceedings against him yet) 1/2 brother whom she is now engaged too.
People are laughing at her, calling her white trash, trailer trash, redneck and any other thing you could think of to call someone who does this. Me and my friends have a nickname for her.......a few actually.........PPT, Psycho Babble, Slut of West Virginia, Drama llama (because she ALWAYS ALWAYS AAAAAALLLLWWAAAAYYYSSS has *some* sort of drama going on, hence why I stopped being friends with her, on top of the CONTINUOUS mistakes she keeps making over and over and over again and not listening to SOUND advice from friends), Creator of BUDS (Baby Uncle Daddy Syndrome...see above story about screwing her childs fathers brother and youll get it), and all kinds of others...
She HONESTLY thinks that what shes doing is "just fine" and that everyone around her thinks is just fabulous...yeah, ok, riiiiiiiiight...thats why the grandmother, mother and stepfather of her now exhusband and his half brother (whos now her fiance) kicked her, HIM and her 3 brats out onto the street right? And shes now living (at last check) with her EX husband, his girlfriend and their kid.
Yeah, her life is "SO wonderful" and people dont have a problem with it??? MMMhmmmm...spare me.
So, thats just a little of what irritates me.
February 28, 2011
February 27, 2011
Burlesque On Demand March 1st!!!!!!!!
And I am so excited about it because I wanted to see it in the theatres but never got a chance to. The make up in that movie is stunning and Ive listened to a lot of the music on itunes and really want to buy it...I have an affinity and adoration for soundtracks from things that I love...i have the soundtracks for "tick...tick...BOOM!", "Rent" "Sex and The City" movie number one (have yet to get it for the second movie), a couple of songs from "Queen of the Damned" (cause, of course, David Draiman sang them....YUM), and a few others...
I know there is an issue between my favorite artist and singer of all time P!NK and Christina Augilera but frankly, I cant help but love them both..and I honestly cant wait to see this movie...I drool over well done make up in movies, watching and trying to figure out in my minds eye how they did *that* blending, what they used, if they used airbrush, if they used MAC, what kind of brushes they used...I live and breathe make up...Ive always loved it and Ive recently found out that I *might* be coming into a bit of money so if I do, I will be able to buy the rest of what I need for my business and I will be a VERY happy girl.
I went to a Tarot reader in October who said that my business would take off in about 6 or 7 months...which is April or May...I did a tarot reading myself the other day who said within 6-7 weeks (it was a very in depth timeline kind of layout for them) it would take off as well...and when is 6 or 7 weeks from now?? The middle of April.
So hopefully between the Tarot reader and my tarot readings I did myself, it will coe true........wait, no, let me rephrase that....it WILL come true. My truck will be fixed in March and I will be able to go out and do make up, hair, get my business really rolling and make the money that I know I can/will make.
Ive said this before that my dream is to be able to survive comfortably on the make up that I do and the clients that I will be getting. My dream is to get into TV and Film make up, doing fashion shows and the like. I don't want to work in a salon,I want to go to different places, see different things, experience different things...
I cant wait for this to take off!!
I know there is an issue between my favorite artist and singer of all time P!NK and Christina Augilera but frankly, I cant help but love them both..and I honestly cant wait to see this movie...I drool over well done make up in movies, watching and trying to figure out in my minds eye how they did *that* blending, what they used, if they used airbrush, if they used MAC, what kind of brushes they used...I live and breathe make up...Ive always loved it and Ive recently found out that I *might* be coming into a bit of money so if I do, I will be able to buy the rest of what I need for my business and I will be a VERY happy girl.
I went to a Tarot reader in October who said that my business would take off in about 6 or 7 months...which is April or May...I did a tarot reading myself the other day who said within 6-7 weeks (it was a very in depth timeline kind of layout for them) it would take off as well...and when is 6 or 7 weeks from now?? The middle of April.
So hopefully between the Tarot reader and my tarot readings I did myself, it will coe true........wait, no, let me rephrase that....it WILL come true. My truck will be fixed in March and I will be able to go out and do make up, hair, get my business really rolling and make the money that I know I can/will make.
Ive said this before that my dream is to be able to survive comfortably on the make up that I do and the clients that I will be getting. My dream is to get into TV and Film make up, doing fashion shows and the like. I don't want to work in a salon,I want to go to different places, see different things, experience different things...
I cant wait for this to take off!!
February 26, 2011
I adore my children but sometimes...
...............They infuriate me...They had arts and crafts paints that I had to throw away because they kept destroying their clothes...there is something wrong with their cable box in their playroom so they havent been able to watch tv. They took out other arts and crafts paints that I had hidden in the trunk that was under their tv...one of them moved the television off the top of it (probably Lilia because shes freakishly strong for an 8 yr old) so now MORE clothes of theirs are destroyed because they werent washable......they were playing with a glue gun and my youngest decided to stick a pencil in the glue compartment so I had to throw away a perfectly good glue gun (that dave has now fixed thank goodness)...now granted, i can buy another one for a couple of $ at Walmart but its infuriating. They have no regard for the things that we have....theyve drawn all over their walls, trash their playroom til it looks like a BOMB exploded and you cant walk across the floor without stepping on SOMETHING....me or dave will sweep and within 20 minutes, the kitchen floor will have trash and debris all over it as if we havent cleaned in a month....they drop water all over the floor without cleaning it up and even time after time after time of me yelling at them, punishing them and putting them in their rooms, they just DONT seem to learn and its making me crazy...
I get that they are creative like me and they are always drawing and writing me little "love notes" and I adore that...but the process in which they do it, they destroy their clothes and anything around them while theyre doing it...When people ask me what they can buy them, i tell them NOT CLOTHES, because they dont seem to get the concept of keeping their clothes NICE...no matter what I tell them about play clothes versus nice NOT play clothes, they NEVER listen...I already only still have one dreser in my room...and short of putting ALL of their clothes in my room with all of my clothes that I cant put away and putting a deadbolt on my door so they cant get in (when im not in there), I dont know what to do...i already have to do that with the livingroom door because they have gotten into and done so much stuff in there its ridiculous...They destroyed the ONLY vocal thing that I had left of Cameron, they ate stuff of daves that he bought specifically for HIMSELF (which he doesnt do often so when he does do it, they dont seem to understand the concept of DONT TOUCH STUFF THAT ISNT YOURS...) we have told them and told them and TOLD them, screamed at them, punished them, and they just seem to think they are entitled to whatever it is that they want and I dont WANT my children to do that.....I just dont know what to do anymore...
I have no problem with the fact they are creative.... but seriously, I walked into the bathroom yesterday to change back into clothes that I had on prior to my neighbor giving me a few dresses to try on and there were little paint splattered hand prints all over the shirt that I had been wearing that my youngest decided to wipe her hands on instead of using the towel that was in there 2 INCHES away from my shirt. I am so fed up and I really just dont know what to do.
I thought they were old enough to know better, to not destroy everything they touch. I thought I was out of the phase that I have to watch them EVERY two seconds...This is what happens when they cant watch tv...Over the last few days since they havent had tv, they've been punished more times then i can count because theyre rambunctious, loud, misbehaved and out of control.
They are 8, almost 7 and 5. I woke up this morning to smelling gas...i went over to the stove and someone had messed with the knobs...so now, its freezing in here because I have four windows open dissipating the smell...I had to wake Dave early because I couldnt get the smell out so he turned off the gas from the line into the stove.
Really?! I mean, whats it going to take????????? Im so frustrated and I dont know what to do about their behaviors.
I get that they are creative like me and they are always drawing and writing me little "love notes" and I adore that...but the process in which they do it, they destroy their clothes and anything around them while theyre doing it...When people ask me what they can buy them, i tell them NOT CLOTHES, because they dont seem to get the concept of keeping their clothes NICE...no matter what I tell them about play clothes versus nice NOT play clothes, they NEVER listen...I already only still have one dreser in my room...and short of putting ALL of their clothes in my room with all of my clothes that I cant put away and putting a deadbolt on my door so they cant get in (when im not in there), I dont know what to do...i already have to do that with the livingroom door because they have gotten into and done so much stuff in there its ridiculous...They destroyed the ONLY vocal thing that I had left of Cameron, they ate stuff of daves that he bought specifically for HIMSELF (which he doesnt do often so when he does do it, they dont seem to understand the concept of DONT TOUCH STUFF THAT ISNT YOURS...) we have told them and told them and TOLD them, screamed at them, punished them, and they just seem to think they are entitled to whatever it is that they want and I dont WANT my children to do that.....I just dont know what to do anymore...
I have no problem with the fact they are creative.... but seriously, I walked into the bathroom yesterday to change back into clothes that I had on prior to my neighbor giving me a few dresses to try on and there were little paint splattered hand prints all over the shirt that I had been wearing that my youngest decided to wipe her hands on instead of using the towel that was in there 2 INCHES away from my shirt. I am so fed up and I really just dont know what to do.
I thought they were old enough to know better, to not destroy everything they touch. I thought I was out of the phase that I have to watch them EVERY two seconds...This is what happens when they cant watch tv...Over the last few days since they havent had tv, they've been punished more times then i can count because theyre rambunctious, loud, misbehaved and out of control.
They are 8, almost 7 and 5. I woke up this morning to smelling gas...i went over to the stove and someone had messed with the knobs...so now, its freezing in here because I have four windows open dissipating the smell...I had to wake Dave early because I couldnt get the smell out so he turned off the gas from the line into the stove.
Really?! I mean, whats it going to take????????? Im so frustrated and I dont know what to do about their behaviors.
February 24, 2011
THIS IS HOW WE STOP THEM!!!!!
Dear April,
You are amazing. Ever since the House of Representatives voted to bar Planned Parenthood from all federal funding, we have seen a massive outpouring of support. I've always known how deeply you and other supporters care about Planned Parenthood and the women, men, and teens who rely on us — but I've neverseen anything like this.
Here are five ways you can help, right now:
If you haven't already, sign our open letter to the members of Congress who voted to bar Planned Parenthood from federal funding — and to the senators who still have a chance to stop it. Half a million people have already signed. Add your name.
https://secure.ppaction.org/site/SPageServer?pagename=pp_ppol_ws_I_Stand_with_PP&pw_id=3007&s_src=istandwppfeb2011things5ppol
Take a stand for Planned Parenthood and the women, men, and teens who rely on us in your community. Click here to find out about local events near you.
http://www.plannedparenthoodaction.org/get-involved/local-events-1039.htm
Make a gift to Planned Parenthood Federation of America. The work that lies ahead of us as the bill moves to the Senate for consideration is nothing short of astonishing. We need your help to rise to this incredible challenge
https://secure.ppaction.org/site/Donation2?idb=0&df_id=3046&3046.donation=form1&autologin=true&pw_id=3008&s_src=istandwppfeb2011things5ppol
Find out how your representative voted on the bill to bar Planned Parenthood from federal funding — and then let him or her know how you feel.
http://www.ppaction.org/site/VoteCenter?page=voteInfo&voteId=11567&scid=1028&pw_id=2964&s_src=istandwppfeb2011things5ppol
Share your story. Extreme anti-choice groups and their allies in Congress are spreading lies and misinformation about who we are and what we do. Help set the record straight by sharing your story about how Planned Parenthood has been there for you, your family, or your friends.
https://secure.ppaction.org/site/SPageServer?pagename=pp_ppol_WS_Stand_with_PP&pw_id=3007&s_src=istandwppfeb2011things5ppol
I can't tell you what an enormous difference your unwavering dedication makes right now for Planned Parenthood and the women, men, and teens who rely on us.
Supporters like you truly are the heart and soul of this organization. Thank you for standing with us.
Sincerely,
Cecile Richards, President
Planned Parenthood Federation of America
You are amazing. Ever since the House of Representatives voted to bar Planned Parenthood from all federal funding, we have seen a massive outpouring of support. I've always known how deeply you and other supporters care about Planned Parenthood and the women, men, and teens who rely on us — but I've neverseen anything like this.
Here are five ways you can help, right now:
If you haven't already, sign our open letter to the members of Congress who voted to bar Planned Parenthood from federal funding — and to the senators who still have a chance to stop it. Half a million people have already signed. Add your name.
https://secure.ppaction.org/site/SPageServer?pagename=pp_ppol_ws_I_Stand_with_PP&pw_id=3007&s_src=istandwppfeb2011things5ppol
Take a stand for Planned Parenthood and the women, men, and teens who rely on us in your community. Click here to find out about local events near you.
http://www.plannedparenthoodaction.org/get-involved/local-events-1039.htm
Make a gift to Planned Parenthood Federation of America. The work that lies ahead of us as the bill moves to the Senate for consideration is nothing short of astonishing. We need your help to rise to this incredible challenge
https://secure.ppaction.org/site/Donation2?idb=0&df_id=3046&3046.donation=form1&autologin=true&pw_id=3008&s_src=istandwppfeb2011things5ppol
Find out how your representative voted on the bill to bar Planned Parenthood from federal funding — and then let him or her know how you feel.
http://www.ppaction.org/site/VoteCenter?page=voteInfo&voteId=11567&scid=1028&pw_id=2964&s_src=istandwppfeb2011things5ppol
Share your story. Extreme anti-choice groups and their allies in Congress are spreading lies and misinformation about who we are and what we do. Help set the record straight by sharing your story about how Planned Parenthood has been there for you, your family, or your friends.
https://secure.ppaction.org/site/SPageServer?pagename=pp_ppol_WS_Stand_with_PP&pw_id=3007&s_src=istandwppfeb2011things5ppol
I can't tell you what an enormous difference your unwavering dedication makes right now for Planned Parenthood and the women, men, and teens who rely on us.
Supporters like you truly are the heart and soul of this organization. Thank you for standing with us.
Sincerely,
Cecile Richards, President
Planned Parenthood Federation of America
February 18, 2011
I STAND WITH PLANNED PARENTHOOD!!!
House of Representatives cancelled ALL funds to health clinics like Planned Parenthood.Planned Parenthoods and local health centers like them provide birth control, Pap tests, and prenatal care to millions of low-income people every year. And Congress wants to stop funding these clinics!
It's up to the Senate to say "no." Please send a quick email and make sure the Senate does not compromise women's health.
CLICK THE LINK BELOW TO SEND THIS EMAIL!!!
http://bit.ly/eERZqH
Please please, everyone, even if youre against abortion, this is about so much more then just abortions....this is cutting funding to men, women and teenagers for HIV testing, Cancer screening, birth control and the like. Planned Parenthood and other organizations like them NEED our support because if they take federal funding away from these places, there are going to be thousands of people that cant get the help they need...if they cant pay for birth control, theyll get pregnant and if they cant terminate the pregnancy, theyll be forced to have the baby, thusly ending up either abusing it because they didnt want it, or end up on the welfare system draining our society even more...Not to mention the fact of HIV testing...would you want to risk your life because you dont know if someone has HIV because they arent able to afford to get testing??? Condoms arent always 100% and they CAN break...do you want to risk it??? Think about it that way....if you were in a position to not be able to afford the birth control that you were on, and went to PLanned Parenthood FOR the lowcost birth control they gave you BECAUSE of the federal Funding they got, and you suddenly had to pay for it yourself, where would that leave you? Where would it leave every OTHER woman out there that needs that?
And men, for those of you that need condoms, and planned parenthood gives them out for free...what happens if they cut the federal funding that SUPPLIED those free condoms....youd have to go without them if you couldnt afford to pay for them...thusly, either ending up with HIV (which, you wont be able to get TESTED for because they took funding away for THAT too) or ending up with an unwanted child.
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASSSSSSSSSSEEEE SUPPORT PLANNED PARENTHOOD!!!!!!!!!!
It's up to the Senate to say "no." Please send a quick email and make sure the Senate does not compromise women's health.
CLICK THE LINK BELOW TO SEND THIS EMAIL!!!
http://bit.ly/eERZqH
Please please, everyone, even if youre against abortion, this is about so much more then just abortions....this is cutting funding to men, women and teenagers for HIV testing, Cancer screening, birth control and the like. Planned Parenthood and other organizations like them NEED our support because if they take federal funding away from these places, there are going to be thousands of people that cant get the help they need...if they cant pay for birth control, theyll get pregnant and if they cant terminate the pregnancy, theyll be forced to have the baby, thusly ending up either abusing it because they didnt want it, or end up on the welfare system draining our society even more...Not to mention the fact of HIV testing...would you want to risk your life because you dont know if someone has HIV because they arent able to afford to get testing??? Condoms arent always 100% and they CAN break...do you want to risk it??? Think about it that way....if you were in a position to not be able to afford the birth control that you were on, and went to PLanned Parenthood FOR the lowcost birth control they gave you BECAUSE of the federal Funding they got, and you suddenly had to pay for it yourself, where would that leave you? Where would it leave every OTHER woman out there that needs that?
And men, for those of you that need condoms, and planned parenthood gives them out for free...what happens if they cut the federal funding that SUPPLIED those free condoms....youd have to go without them if you couldnt afford to pay for them...thusly, either ending up with HIV (which, you wont be able to get TESTED for because they took funding away for THAT too) or ending up with an unwanted child.
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASSSSSSSSSSEEEE SUPPORT PLANNED PARENTHOOD!!!!!!!!!!
February 15, 2011
IM NOT AFRAID.
So, after some thought, observation and other things, I have noticed that all of the supoort and belief in people and all that that Ive given of myself, people cant seem to reciprocate. I am seriously fucking tired of being walked on, taken advantage of and the like....so, from now on, NO MORE FREE ANYTHING.....no more free hair, no more free make up, no more of my "free" time....If IM not getting anything out of something, I wont do it. I dont go out anymore to get drunk, its stupid. When I give freely, i get nothing in return. So, Im done doing that. At the urgency of a very good friend of mine (thank you Nikki), i will NO LONGER BE OFFERING MY SERVICES FOR FREE. I will no longer give of anything of myself for free....because after all that ive done, I honestly feel like I have been completely taken advantage of. This is my business. It will be what eventually support my family and myself because I dont want to struggle on what I do get a month....I have alot to offer this world and I honestly feel like I am not getting full advantages to it.
Some people may not like this but I dont give a shit anymore. I am tired of being the kind sweet generous person, to afraid to say No because it might "get me exposure." fuck that. Ive done enough shit to "get me exposure" and it hasnt. Im tired of sitting around waiting for shit to come to me..........From now on, I guess if i MUST be cut throat, I will be. Im tired of not feeling like I exist in this world. Im tired of "being ignored" and being made to feel like I am worthless and have nothing to offer, and the stuff that i DO have to offer, I get asked to do shit for free.
Im done....If you dont like it, Get Bent and delete me. Im done being taken advantage of. Its time for the Bad Ass Bitch to come back again because SHE got more accomplished in this life then the "nice" me did and has....
I'm not afraid to take a stand
Everybody come take my hand
We'll walk this road together, through the storm
Whatever weather, cold or warm
Just let you know that, you're not alone
Holla if you feel that you've been down the same road
(Intro)
Yeah, It's been a ride...
I guess I had to go to that place to get to this one
Now some of you might still be in that place
If you're trying to get out, just follow me
I'll get you there
(Verse 1)
You can try and read my lyrics off of this paper before I lay 'em
But you won't take this thing out these words before I say 'em
Cause ain't no way I'm let you stop me from causing mayhem
When I say 'em or do something I do it, I don't give a damn
What you think, I'm doing this for me, so fuck the world
Feed it beans, it's gassed up, if a thing's stopping me
I'mma be what I set out to be, without a doubt undoubtedly
And all those who look down on me I'm tearing down your balcony
No if ands or buts don't try to ask him why or how can he
From Infinite down to the last Relapse album he's still shit'n
Whether he's on salary, paid hourly
Until he bows out or he shit's his bowels out of him
Whichever comes first, for better or worse
He's married to the game, like a fuck you for christmas
His gift is a curse, forget the earth he's got the urge
To pull his dick from the dirt and fuck the universe
(Hook)
I'm not afraid to take a stand
Everybody come take my hand
We'll walk this road together, through the storm
Whatever weather, cold or warm
Just let you know that, you're not alone
Holla if you feel that you've been down the same road
(Verse 2)
Ok quit playin' with the scissors and shit, and cut the crap
I shouldn't have to rhyme these words in the rhythm for you to know it's a rap
You said you was king, you lied through your teeth
For that fuck your fillings, instead of getting crowned you're getting capped
And to the fans, I'll never let you down again, I'm back
I promise to never go back on that promise, in fact
Let's be honest, that last Relapse CD was "ehhhh"
Perhaps I ran them accents into the ground
Relax, I ain't going back to that now
All I'm tryna say is get back, click-clack BLAOW
Cause I ain't playin' around
There's a game called circle and I don't know how
I'm way too up to back down
But I think I'm still tryna figure this crap out
Thought I had it mapped out but I guess I didn't
This fucking black cloud still follow's me around
But it's time to exercise these demons
These motherfuckers are doing jumping jacks now!
(Hook)
I'm not afraid to take a stand
Everybody come take my hand
We'll walk this road together, through the storm
Whatever weather, cold or warm
Just let you know that, you're not alone
Holla if you feel that you've been down the same road
(Bridge)
And I just can't keep living this way
So starting today, I'm breaking out of this cage
I'm standing up, Imma face my demons
I'm manning up, Imma hold my ground
I've had enough, now I'm so fed up
Time to put my life back together right now
(Verse 3)
It was my decision to get clean, I did it for me
Admittedly I probably did it subliminally for you
So I could come back a brand new me, you helped see me through
And don't even realise what you did, believe me you
I been through the ringer, but they can do little to the middle finger
I think I got a tear in my eye, I feel like the king of
My world, haters can make like bees with no stingers, and drop dead
No more beef flingers, no more drama from now on, I promise
To focus soley on handling my responsibility's as a father
So I solemnly swear to always treat this roof like my daughters and raise it
You couldn't lift a single shingle on it
Cause the way I feel, I'm strong enough to go to the club
Or the corner pub and lift the whole liquor counter up
Cause I'm raising the bar, I shoot for the moon
But I'm too busy gazing at stars, I feel amazing and
(Hook)
I'm not afraid to take a stand
Everybody come take my hand
We'll walk this road together, through the storm
Whatever weather, cold or warm
Just let you know that, you're not alone
Holla if you feel that you've been down the same road
Some people may not like this but I dont give a shit anymore. I am tired of being the kind sweet generous person, to afraid to say No because it might "get me exposure." fuck that. Ive done enough shit to "get me exposure" and it hasnt. Im tired of sitting around waiting for shit to come to me..........From now on, I guess if i MUST be cut throat, I will be. Im tired of not feeling like I exist in this world. Im tired of "being ignored" and being made to feel like I am worthless and have nothing to offer, and the stuff that i DO have to offer, I get asked to do shit for free.
Im done....If you dont like it, Get Bent and delete me. Im done being taken advantage of. Its time for the Bad Ass Bitch to come back again because SHE got more accomplished in this life then the "nice" me did and has....
I'm not afraid to take a stand
Everybody come take my hand
We'll walk this road together, through the storm
Whatever weather, cold or warm
Just let you know that, you're not alone
Holla if you feel that you've been down the same road
(Intro)
Yeah, It's been a ride...
I guess I had to go to that place to get to this one
Now some of you might still be in that place
If you're trying to get out, just follow me
I'll get you there
(Verse 1)
You can try and read my lyrics off of this paper before I lay 'em
But you won't take this thing out these words before I say 'em
Cause ain't no way I'm let you stop me from causing mayhem
When I say 'em or do something I do it, I don't give a damn
What you think, I'm doing this for me, so fuck the world
Feed it beans, it's gassed up, if a thing's stopping me
I'mma be what I set out to be, without a doubt undoubtedly
And all those who look down on me I'm tearing down your balcony
No if ands or buts don't try to ask him why or how can he
From Infinite down to the last Relapse album he's still shit'n
Whether he's on salary, paid hourly
Until he bows out or he shit's his bowels out of him
Whichever comes first, for better or worse
He's married to the game, like a fuck you for christmas
His gift is a curse, forget the earth he's got the urge
To pull his dick from the dirt and fuck the universe
(Hook)
I'm not afraid to take a stand
Everybody come take my hand
We'll walk this road together, through the storm
Whatever weather, cold or warm
Just let you know that, you're not alone
Holla if you feel that you've been down the same road
(Verse 2)
Ok quit playin' with the scissors and shit, and cut the crap
I shouldn't have to rhyme these words in the rhythm for you to know it's a rap
You said you was king, you lied through your teeth
For that fuck your fillings, instead of getting crowned you're getting capped
And to the fans, I'll never let you down again, I'm back
I promise to never go back on that promise, in fact
Let's be honest, that last Relapse CD was "ehhhh"
Perhaps I ran them accents into the ground
Relax, I ain't going back to that now
All I'm tryna say is get back, click-clack BLAOW
Cause I ain't playin' around
There's a game called circle and I don't know how
I'm way too up to back down
But I think I'm still tryna figure this crap out
Thought I had it mapped out but I guess I didn't
This fucking black cloud still follow's me around
But it's time to exercise these demons
These motherfuckers are doing jumping jacks now!
(Hook)
I'm not afraid to take a stand
Everybody come take my hand
We'll walk this road together, through the storm
Whatever weather, cold or warm
Just let you know that, you're not alone
Holla if you feel that you've been down the same road
(Bridge)
And I just can't keep living this way
So starting today, I'm breaking out of this cage
I'm standing up, Imma face my demons
I'm manning up, Imma hold my ground
I've had enough, now I'm so fed up
Time to put my life back together right now
(Verse 3)
It was my decision to get clean, I did it for me
Admittedly I probably did it subliminally for you
So I could come back a brand new me, you helped see me through
And don't even realise what you did, believe me you
I been through the ringer, but they can do little to the middle finger
I think I got a tear in my eye, I feel like the king of
My world, haters can make like bees with no stingers, and drop dead
No more beef flingers, no more drama from now on, I promise
To focus soley on handling my responsibility's as a father
So I solemnly swear to always treat this roof like my daughters and raise it
You couldn't lift a single shingle on it
Cause the way I feel, I'm strong enough to go to the club
Or the corner pub and lift the whole liquor counter up
Cause I'm raising the bar, I shoot for the moon
But I'm too busy gazing at stars, I feel amazing and
(Hook)
I'm not afraid to take a stand
Everybody come take my hand
We'll walk this road together, through the storm
Whatever weather, cold or warm
Just let you know that, you're not alone
Holla if you feel that you've been down the same road
February 05, 2011
These are the things that I want in 2011
I was talking to a friend of mine a few weeks ago (actually, its been almost a month since this conversation, holy crap!) and he was talking about a singer whos blog he was reading. He was telling me that every year, she writes a list of things she wants to have happen during that specific year. He told me he just did the same thing and only had 7 things and already, 15 days into the year (we spoke around the 14th of January)and 5 of his things had already come true...So, that got me to thinking...I finally wrote one and this is what I have on MY list.
#1 I would like a washer and dryer so that I do not have to go to the blasted horrible laundry mat anymore. as of last weekend, 5/5/2012, i FINALLY got the washer and dryer!!!
#2 I would like to finish all the tattoos that I started and get the ones that I want.
#3 I would like to get all new pots and pans for my kitchen as most, if not all, are rusted, falling apart or just plain beat up to the point of being really hard to clean.
#4 I would like to finish transferring all of my make up for my business into MAC Palettes and get new brushes for the business so that I can stop using my personal brushes. ---(As of 2-28-11, ive gotten 4 palettes from another company that I will be buying from from now on...theyre products are awesome and their prices fantastic!! Ill still, of course, buy from MAC but now I dont have to stress!!! WOOHOOO!!!)
#5 I would like to put getting breast implants into motion to enhance my figure and fix the issues that I have.
#7 Be able to have food in my house at all times instead of just the normal "blizzard food" milk, bread, eggs, cereal, yada yada...I want my cupboards so stocked full of food that I have no room to put anymore, on a consistent basis.
#8 I would really love to get my body 100% to the way I want it to look.
#9 I would love to get through my sewing and dressmaking course so that I can start making clothes. I would also like to get the dress making mannequin that I need for this purpose.
#10 Get rid of the stupid wart that I have on my finger that Ive been fighting since over the summer and have it STAY gone. Its highly irritating when I can feel it when Im writing, close my fingers or hold a make up brush.
Some of them are simple and still others are a little more complex but these are the things that I would really like to have happen in 2011.
#1 I would like a washer and dryer so that I do not have to go to the blasted horrible laundry mat anymore. as of last weekend, 5/5/2012, i FINALLY got the washer and dryer!!!
#2 I would like to finish all the tattoos that I started and get the ones that I want.
#3 I would like to get all new pots and pans for my kitchen as most, if not all, are rusted, falling apart or just plain beat up to the point of being really hard to clean.
#4 I would like to finish transferring all of my make up for my business into MAC Palettes and get new brushes for the business so that I can stop using my personal brushes. ---(As of 2-28-11, ive gotten 4 palettes from another company that I will be buying from from now on...theyre products are awesome and their prices fantastic!! Ill still, of course, buy from MAC but now I dont have to stress!!! WOOHOOO!!!)
#5 I would like to put getting breast implants into motion to enhance my figure and fix the issues that I have.
#7 Be able to have food in my house at all times instead of just the normal "blizzard food" milk, bread, eggs, cereal, yada yada...I want my cupboards so stocked full of food that I have no room to put anymore, on a consistent basis.
#8 I would really love to get my body 100% to the way I want it to look.
#9 I would love to get through my sewing and dressmaking course so that I can start making clothes. I would also like to get the dress making mannequin that I need for this purpose.
#10 Get rid of the stupid wart that I have on my finger that Ive been fighting since over the summer and have it STAY gone. Its highly irritating when I can feel it when Im writing, close my fingers or hold a make up brush.
Some of them are simple and still others are a little more complex but these are the things that I would really like to have happen in 2011.
February 03, 2011
If you want it....get it.
If you want it, get it. If you dream it, believe it. The sky's never the limit. So go on, show the world who you are. Don't be afraid to show your true colors.
I was scrolling through the Status shuffle app and this one hit me really strongly and I felt like I needed to write about it.
Over the years, I had people tell me what my dreams should be, where I should go with my life, and how I should do things THIER way...And, when I broke free of that and started following my OWN Bliss and having the courage to do it, people balked, they gossiped, they judged and they grudged....the only thing that I can say to that is that Im just being ME. Showing my true colors and as someone said to me recently, "marching to beat of my own drummer."
And, I agree. I have always been the kind of person who didn't bend to fashion, to current trends, to whatever was "in". Ive always had my OWN dreams, buried underneath all of the "other dreams" that other PEOPLE thought I should have.
And Im happy. And alot of people cant understand that. Alot of people cant see that the way that I live is right for ME and for US as a family. I dont harm anyone or anything. I dont smoke, I dont do drugs. I rarely drink if ever now. So, what is it about me that people continually think is wrong?
Because I homeschool? Because Im Wiccan? Because I have 22 tattoos and counting? Because I remarried after Cameron died?
Well, truth be told, and Ive told a great many people this...whether they believe me or not is another story, but I dont care. Ive got news for people......
IM DOING EXACTLY WHAT CAMERON SAID HE WANTED ME TO DO IF ANYTHING EVER HAPPENED TO HIM.
Right before he died, we laid in our bed, late one night in the dark, talking, as we always did before falling asleep. We were having the "if anything ever happened to me" conversation and we were telling each other what we wanted for the other if one of us were to die.
And this is EXACTLY, word for word, what he told me...
"If anything ever happened to me, I would want you to mourn and grieve for a while but then I want you to move on...find someone who makes you happy. And love them."
So, thats what I did. Dave and I have been together for over four years now and even after all the bull that we've been through, the separation and almost divorce, its come to my attention and realization that we are meant to be.
As for me being Wiccan, well, again, people have another thing coming..........it is NOT *just* a phase...it is something that I feel really strongly for, feel the Goddess coursing through my veins, breathe her in when I'm outside... People may not understand it or believe in what I do but thats the beauty of freedom of religion in this country. They believe what they believe and Ill happily, and quietly, believe in what I want to. People need to realize that this is NOT going away. I will ALWAYS wear my pentacle, I will always call on the gods, Goddess...I will do what I do and if people cant accept that, then they dont need to be in my life....OR, my girls lives.
So, here I am, almost 35 years old, living the life that *I* want, that *I* am happy with. If people cant accept it, they can pound sand, kick rocks, and get bent.
I was scrolling through the Status shuffle app and this one hit me really strongly and I felt like I needed to write about it.
Over the years, I had people tell me what my dreams should be, where I should go with my life, and how I should do things THIER way...And, when I broke free of that and started following my OWN Bliss and having the courage to do it, people balked, they gossiped, they judged and they grudged....the only thing that I can say to that is that Im just being ME. Showing my true colors and as someone said to me recently, "marching to beat of my own drummer."
And, I agree. I have always been the kind of person who didn't bend to fashion, to current trends, to whatever was "in". Ive always had my OWN dreams, buried underneath all of the "other dreams" that other PEOPLE thought I should have.
And Im happy. And alot of people cant understand that. Alot of people cant see that the way that I live is right for ME and for US as a family. I dont harm anyone or anything. I dont smoke, I dont do drugs. I rarely drink if ever now. So, what is it about me that people continually think is wrong?
Because I homeschool? Because Im Wiccan? Because I have 22 tattoos and counting? Because I remarried after Cameron died?
Well, truth be told, and Ive told a great many people this...whether they believe me or not is another story, but I dont care. Ive got news for people......
IM DOING EXACTLY WHAT CAMERON SAID HE WANTED ME TO DO IF ANYTHING EVER HAPPENED TO HIM.
Right before he died, we laid in our bed, late one night in the dark, talking, as we always did before falling asleep. We were having the "if anything ever happened to me" conversation and we were telling each other what we wanted for the other if one of us were to die.
And this is EXACTLY, word for word, what he told me...
"If anything ever happened to me, I would want you to mourn and grieve for a while but then I want you to move on...find someone who makes you happy. And love them."
So, thats what I did. Dave and I have been together for over four years now and even after all the bull that we've been through, the separation and almost divorce, its come to my attention and realization that we are meant to be.
As for me being Wiccan, well, again, people have another thing coming..........it is NOT *just* a phase...it is something that I feel really strongly for, feel the Goddess coursing through my veins, breathe her in when I'm outside... People may not understand it or believe in what I do but thats the beauty of freedom of religion in this country. They believe what they believe and Ill happily, and quietly, believe in what I want to. People need to realize that this is NOT going away. I will ALWAYS wear my pentacle, I will always call on the gods, Goddess...I will do what I do and if people cant accept that, then they dont need to be in my life....OR, my girls lives.
So, here I am, almost 35 years old, living the life that *I* want, that *I* am happy with. If people cant accept it, they can pound sand, kick rocks, and get bent.
February 02, 2011
If they truly love you...
If you are dating a man/woman who cheats on you, talks down to you, refuses to support you, abuses you in any way shape or form, DUMP HIM/HER IMMEDIATELY. Do not give an ultimatum, just leave/kick them out. If he/she doesn't respect and love you now, he/she never will even if you lose the weight, change your looks/personality to make them happy, become the "barbie dol"l porn start type chick/hugely muscle-y hung porn guy.......You deserve better. It doesn't matter if you're 400 lbs or 120 lbs, if you have red hair, blonde hair, black hair or purple with blue stripes and polka dotted hair... Someone who loves you will love you no matter what, for who you are or what you look like.
A man (or woman) who loves you will never cheat or threaten to cheat "because" of your weight, hair, personality etc....
A man (or woman) who loves you will never make you feel that you are unworthy of him/her.
A man (or woman) who loves you will never belittle or talk down to you about your weight/looks/personality/etc...
A man (or woman) who loves you will always want the best for your health and happiness.
A man (or woman) who loves you will always provide positive support to you in your journey, whatever it may be...
A man (or woman) who loves you will always celebrate your victories and help you move past your failures.
Stand up for yourself. Don't be afraid to be single just because you're with some jerk. I don't care what he or she says. You CAN and SHOULD have better. Surround yourself with loving friends and family and keep your chin up.
Hold your head up high ladies (and gents)! Be proud of yourself and surround yourself with the ones who love you, boyfriend/girlfriend/fiancee/spouse or not....there is to many beautiful things in this world to surround yourself with people who have ugly, black hearts who seek out to destroy other people simply because they feel the need.
A man (or woman) who loves you will never cheat or threaten to cheat "because" of your weight, hair, personality etc....
A man (or woman) who loves you will never make you feel that you are unworthy of him/her.
A man (or woman) who loves you will never belittle or talk down to you about your weight/looks/personality/etc...
A man (or woman) who loves you will always want the best for your health and happiness.
A man (or woman) who loves you will always provide positive support to you in your journey, whatever it may be...
A man (or woman) who loves you will always celebrate your victories and help you move past your failures.
Stand up for yourself. Don't be afraid to be single just because you're with some jerk. I don't care what he or she says. You CAN and SHOULD have better. Surround yourself with loving friends and family and keep your chin up.
Hold your head up high ladies (and gents)! Be proud of yourself and surround yourself with the ones who love you, boyfriend/girlfriend/fiancee/spouse or not....there is to many beautiful things in this world to surround yourself with people who have ugly, black hearts who seek out to destroy other people simply because they feel the need.
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