If you want it....get it.

If you want it, get it. If you dream it, believe it. The sky's never the limit. So go on, show the world who you are. Don't be afraid to show your true colors.

I was scrolling through the Status shuffle app and this one hit me really strongly and I felt like I needed to write about it.

Over the years, I had people tell me what my dreams should be, where I should go with my life, and how I should do things THIER way...And, when I broke free of that and started following my OWN Bliss and having the courage to do it, people balked, they gossiped, they judged and they grudged....the only thing that I can say to that is that Im just being ME. Showing my true colors and as someone said to me recently, "marching to beat of my own drummer."

And, I agree. I have always been the kind of person who didn't bend to fashion, to current trends, to whatever was "in". Ive always had my OWN dreams, buried underneath all of the "other dreams" that other PEOPLE thought I should have.

And Im happy. And alot of people cant understand that. Alot of people cant see that the way that I live is right for ME and for US as a family. I dont harm anyone or anything. I dont smoke, I dont do drugs. I rarely drink if ever now. So, what is it about me that people continually think is wrong?

Because I homeschool? Because Im Wiccan? Because I have 22 tattoos and counting? Because I remarried after Cameron died?

Well, truth be told, and Ive told a great many people this...whether they believe me or not is another story, but I dont care. Ive got news for people......

IM DOING EXACTLY WHAT CAMERON SAID HE WANTED ME TO DO IF ANYTHING EVER HAPPENED TO HIM.

Right before he died, we laid in our bed, late one night in the dark, talking, as we always did before falling asleep. We were having the "if anything ever happened to me" conversation and we were telling each other what we wanted for the other if one of us were to die.

And this is EXACTLY, word for word, what he told me...

"If anything ever happened to me, I would want you to mourn and grieve for a while but then I want you to move on...find someone who makes you happy. And love them."

So, thats what I did. Dave and I have been together for over four years now and even after all the bull that we've been through, the separation and almost divorce, its come to my attention and realization that we are meant to be.

As for me being Wiccan, well, again, people have another thing coming..........it is NOT *just* a phase...it is something that I feel really strongly for, feel the Goddess coursing through my veins, breathe her in when I'm outside... People may not understand it or believe in what I do but thats the beauty of freedom of religion in this country. They believe what they believe and Ill happily, and quietly, believe in what I want to. People need to realize that this is NOT going away. I will ALWAYS wear my pentacle, I will always call on the gods, Goddess...I will do what I do and if people cant accept that, then they dont need to be in my life....OR, my girls lives.

So, here I am, almost 35 years old, living the life that *I* want, that *I* am happy with. If people cant accept it, they can pound sand, kick rocks, and get bent.